Joe Le Taxi (inspired by Vanessa Paradis’ simpering ditty)

Thursday means cab day because I have to lay off the streets for bearing a car plate number ending in 8, as a courtesy to other motorists. I usually take a cab because my hubby starts his workday in Libis, whereas my office is in Makati, the opposite direction. He picks me up at the end of the day. Oftentimes I enjoy the cab option, mainly because it means a reprieve from the stress of driving my ass to work in record time. Taxis racing at breakneck speed never fail me.



Usually my trusty girl Maricel dials the numbers of cab companies one by one until she hits jackpot. Competition can get pretty ferocious during the morning rush hour but at least you’re assured of clean, safe transport. Most of the cabbies I get can be quite chatty and since I’m not really a morning person, I try to keep the conversation at a minimum – “Good morning sir, I need to go to Makati and please avoid potholes because I am pregnant”. And then I either (a) look out the window and zone out or (b) whip out a book and start reading. I’ve had my fill of annoying cabbies enough to know how to discourage contact. One gave an impassioned soliloquy on the evils of the GMA administration from Ortigas to Makati. Another regaled me with stories of his stint in Dubai and how everything else back here just cannot compare. And yet another kept repeating that I reminded him of erstwhile starlet Mariz (now wife of Ronnie Ricketts). I made a comment that maybe he could’ve picked someone with more recent fame (like, hello!) and unwittingly provided an opening for incessant Mariz trivia sharing. Turns out this guy was a diehard fan of Ronnie and Mariz. Jeez.

Some things I have observed as a habitual Thursday cab rider:

1. Almost always the radio would be playing “Making Love out of Nothing at All” or some other horrible Air Supply tune. Invariably the cabbie would be tuned in to this radio station with the horrible repetitive line, “Kailangan bang i-memorize yan?!”.

2. Cabs always take Edsa. This personally pains me because I have to yet again be subjected to Kris Aquino’s multiple Edsa billboards (I take the side roads to Makati to avoid them). Bench Body with Kris in awkward brassieres layered with sheer, slinky tank tops. Bello with Kris in a corset. And the awful SanSan cosmetics streamers! They line up the posts like an accident waiting to happen. The lady has a one-dimensional expression in all her layouts. I have heard of ham actors but can it actually be possible for one to be a ham model? One cabbie declared his general distaste for la madame Kris and we had a spirited exchange that I actually found highly engaging.



3. Cabbies never have loose change so when you give them a 100 peso bill for an 80 peso trip, expect the 20 pesos to be a goner. Read: always come prepared with loose change in twenties and fifties.

Sometimes I encounter delightful little surprises in my cab forays. Like the time I got a female driver. Okay – I have to say that I first thought she was a he because she resembled a little Erap complete with bouffant hair and wrist cuff. She was courteous, drove expertly (bucking the trend of bad lady drivers, but then again, she ain’t no lady…) and spoke in English (Aba naman! Napa-English rin tuloy ako!). She bid me goodbye and gave me a wink too. What a sweetheart. Cabbies aren’t all that bad.

Here are cab numbers to put on your speed dial. My only regret is that these cabs don’t come with funky names. I recall one that was rather macabre I refused to take. It was named Diana Death.

EMP Taxi: 2935930
MGE Taxi: 3636096
R&E Taxi: 3629090
Basic Taxi: 9001447
24/7 Taxi: 6423525 (Yes they live up to their name)
Avis Taxi: 5320605 (Best for trips to the airport. They have unmarked AUVs with lots of luggage room)

P.S. None of the enclosed pics are mine, I just lifted them off google images. Photos courtesy of www.jimmyoliver.net and members.shaw.ca